Monday 10 December 2018

The Loch Ness Monster and the Unfortunate Goat




Another Nessie fan had mentioned a land sighting to me which had escaped my attention but I thought should check out. The story comes from a less well known book published in 1972 entitled "The Loch Ness Monster" by Elwood Baumann which runs thusly:

The next expedition was made up of two young Germans. Their plan seemed like a reasonable one. They were going to rent bicycles and pedal round and round the loch. Whenever they saw the monster, they would hop off and photograph it from different angles. They seemed rather startled when someone pointed out to them that a bicycle trip around the loch involved seventy-two miles of pedaling. Nevertheless, they rented two light-weight English bikes and set off on their big adventure. When they returned the following evening, they were flushed with triumph. Their expedition had been unbelievably successful. They had photographed the monster splashing playfully around only a few yards offshore. They had also managed to get pictures of the monster asleep on a sandbank and eating a goat in a pine forest.

An understandably cynical Highlander listened to their story and tried to hide his smile. It was a pity, he told them, that they hadn't been fortunate enough to get a picture of the monster climbing a tree or having lunch in the Drumnadrochit Hotel. Someone else gently suggested that the Germans have their film developed in Inverness. That way, the local residents could have a good look at the monster, he told them. This the two Germans refused to do. The editor of an important magazine in Germany was going to give them a great deal of money for their film, they said, and they were anxious to get home and collect it. Unfortunately, their departure from Inverness was delayed. The police had been informed that two young monster hunters had left the Foyers Hotel without paying for their rooms, drinks, or meals. It also developed that the two men had brought the rented bicycles onto the train with them. The Loch Ness Monster expedition from Germany came to an unhappy end when the heavy door of the Inverness jail slammed shut behind its two members.

If you peruse Amazon, you will see that Mr. Baumann was a busy author in the field of mysteries during the 1970s with books published on Nessie, Bigfoot, Monsters of North America, UFOs, Vampires, the Devil's Triangle and, of course, motorcycles. In other words, he was not a dedicated expert on the monster and most likely was either commissioned to write a series of books or wrote them on his own initiative. On my list of Nessie books, I say this about his book:

This was one of several mysteries books written by Baumann. It is another boilerplate book which basically surveys the sightings history though since Mr. Elwood was a member of the LNPIB there is a bit of extra emphasis on their work. The book suffers the indignity of the Hugh Gray Nessie photograph being printed upside-down and the front cover sculpture of Nessie by Dick Dulany is intriguing to say the least!

The 1970s saw a flood of books mentioning Nessie as monster fever rose to a crescendo with the 1975 Rines pictures before abating into the sceptical 1980s. It is therefore no surprise that any author with an eye for mysteries and a buck were busily deploying their typewriters in this pursuit. But what about the actual story?

The first problem is that Baumann nowhere states the source for this story, or any others for that matter. It is a story to excite rather than research. So, I have no way of investigating it further from a purely journalistic point of view. But it hardly needs to be said that this is a story which has its tongue firmly embedded in its cheek. There may well have been two Germans making sensational claims, but the tenor of the story clearly implies we should not take it seriously at all.

I don't think Baumann made it up, I rather think it is a story that is of the same genre as the German hoax story of 1934 and I think that is where we should leave this one. As for German on bikes in the 1930s, it is now established that a lot of German youth in the early 1930s were coming over to Britain as hikers and bikers in the guise of tourists to spy out the British infrastructure for war purposes. In that light, perhaps this concocted story was a cover for more sinister activities?


The author can be contacted at lochnesskelpie@gmail.com



15 comments:

  1. Sounds just too good to be true, such a film would make one a fortune. The odds of two incredible sightings are extremely steep. Finding the goat body would reveal bite radius and clues to the monsters physical features. Imagine a biological study done by experts in the field on the goat remains.

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    1. It's nonsense - Nessie sleeping on the shore? Right.

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  2. Every once in a while you see people cycling that north shore road, usually with a sizeable queue of not-impressed drivers behind them.

    It’s one of those routes that looks good on a map but the reality is a bit different.

    If these punters cycled the whole way round in a day I’m guessing it wouldn’t have been triumph that had them flushed.

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  3. Absolute nonsense then? Still, fun to read about. For some strange reason I have little animosity to hoaxers up until the 90s - or nonsense stories. I can give them all a pass, even Frank Searle - who was clearly a complete nutter - because at least he lived at the loch before going gaga. Like he'd earned the right to go dangerously insane. Possibly it's because there was so much reasonable evidence available it didn't seem to matter.

    Conversely, George Edwards recent attempt really got my goat. Which isn't fair - it was a decent attempt and he's been at the Loch a long time I just can't help it. Anyway, fun article GB.

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    1. Edwards' problem seems to be he portrays himself as a believer, but I could be wrong. At least other sceptics are honest about their hostility.

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    2. Ach, I ultimately forgive Edwards too. If you're committed enough to try to pull off a hoax it means some part of you loves the whole thing and I can understand that. Though it's in effect an admission that deep down you probably don't believe. I just think he was a bit silly in how blatant it was and at the time it really did my nut. Shiels is probably my favourite hoaxer - the amount of "Heh heh"s in that transcript where he plans all his future misdeeds is pretty amusing. The man is certifiable.

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    3. Agreed kyle...frightening thing is edwards hoax was actually a good one...he nearly pulled it off!!! Even mr feltham originally believed it and even the owner of the hump himself didnt recognize it in the newspaper photo!!! Thank goodnes for the owners sharp eyed friend who was up from wales at the time who recognized the hump in the newspaper and convinced the owner that it was indeed the hump that belonged to him!! If not we wud all be probbly still talking bout his hoax as a potential sighting!! Crazy!! Edwards wud neva have admitted it if he hadnt bin rumbled!!! Ive personallt met edwards a few times and bin on his boat trips..he told me once he had seen nessie bout 15 times ova the years..he came across as a liar but he came across as a real nice chap and always waved to me and my daughter if he passed us! Shame he tried to pull the wool ova everyones eyes...which he nearly did!!!
      .

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    4. Ha ha 15 times? Ooft. Alex Campbell never claimed he saw it that many times did he? Again if he's seen it 15 times why the need to attempt a fake?

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  4. This book is the culprit that got me into the loch ness mystery!!!! I found it in the school library in my early teens and took it home to read....it got me hooked and 30 odd years later im still hooked :-) Mr Baumann u have cost me a fortune in trips and books and wat have u!!!! Lol...Roy

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  5. Another anecdotal story to add to the heap of Nessie lore, ludicrous or not. Wasn't there a bonafide land sighting of The LNM chomping on a goat, or sheep? Supposedly that is where those well known paintings of a plesiosaur type creature with something in it's mouth originate from. When I say bonifide, I mean one taken seriously.

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    1. I thought the Nessie with sheep/ goat in its mouth idea came from the Spicer sighting?

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    2. Yeah, that's it ...I guess. The Spicer account is just too vague and unclear. Something on the monsters back,lamb in it's mouth, the tip of the tail. Who knows. just thought there might have been another instance.

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  6. Never been convinced by stories of Nessie snacking on Loch side wildlife. There’s very little wild or farmed beasts shoreside around the Loch. What there is requires a trek across busy roads and up fairly long and steep gradients to get to.

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    1. What about in the 30s? Was there more livestock near the shore back in the day? Btw I'm not suggesting you're 100 years old RP but I know you're a local ;)

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  7. Maybe slightly more but I wouldn’t have thought much more.

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